A few weeks ago, one of the best men I’ll ever know passed away quietly just a few days before his 90th birthday. I believe his character, intention, leadership skills and example were everything anyone could ever have wanted in a husband, father, grandfather, son, son-in-law, brother, nephew, uncle or friend. The kindest, most loving example of a human I’ve ever experienced…..And yet, so extraordinarily simple.

Regularly, he would graciously accept my request to meet with him. He’d listen quietly and intently as I shared personal and professional situations and challenges. When we spoke, I felt as though I was in a movie. His low and slow, calm yet powerful voice resonated like James Earl Jones in Field of Dreams. His peaceful and reassuring presence made you feel safe and relaxed. I remember feeling fortunate to be navigating my own life through the lens of someone so much wiser and more experienced. Yet even in my lack of experience or maturity, he was always understanding, patient, grace-filled and never judgemental. 

He had driven the same small, plain white, single cab pickup truck for decades. He lived in the same one-level home for even longer. He showcased the same ordinary outfit for what seemed like every casual occasion. His black, slightly faded jeans, plaid, short-sleeved, button-down shirt, black belt and black shoes with white socks. His white thinning hair combed over in the same simple style. Interesting that I remember exactly what he wore, how he combed his hair, the details of his vehicle and the pace in which he drove it. The details of how he walked, listened and prayed are so clear in my mind. I studied how he approached people and topics, how he planted his garden, pruned his trees, responded to his wife, children and the community…and even how he cut his grass. All so very simple.

Why did I watch so intently? From a distance, he didn’t fit “the mold” of someone we normally strive to emulate. Just the opposite, as we continue to admire our celebrities, financial moguls, presidents of large and larger companies, and owners of mansions, newer vehicles and nicer clothes.

My friend chose to be different.

His humility prevented him from knowing I was watching. Most of the time, I didn’t even realize I was studying him. I just was. I believe his personal mission was unintentional. Just a feeling in his heart with a desire to pour into every human interaction. He wasn’t following a book’s instructions. He was simply living. 

I imagine, 70 years earlier, he had written his own mission on one of his old collections of stationary. I envision it reading, “to love deeply, each and every person, while experiencing a simple life well-lived.” 

His life focused on the simple priorities of Faith and Family. He knew that’s what provided him deep joy, and he allowed each of his simple actions to demonstrate those few simple priorities.

His simplicity reflected “Greatness.”

When you’re in the presence of greatness, you pay attention to everything. The desire to emulate even the smallest details becomes important. I would ask him a question, then wait on the edge of my chair for his response. Slow, deep, and methodical, the response would come. Many times in the form of another question. He knew the right answer was always there, inside of me, waiting to arrive. 

His process to help me was simple. He knew I just needed time and patience getting to the next step.

He treated everyone with that same level of simplicity. Straightforward in his dealings with anyone…from the mayor, to the local priest, to the Walmart greeter, to the car salesman. He was always direct with his viewpoint. And at the same time he offered his thoughts, you felt his kind and loving intention.

When I would call, his beautiful wife would normally answer the home phone. After a short greeting, she would put the phone down for a moment and yell to her husband, “It's that Manhart guy!”  I would feel him slowly rise from his beloved recliner, walk across the living room to the phone and greet me with a slow, deep and southern, “Well, I’ll be, what in the world do I owe this pleasure?” 

When you spoke with him, and even in a room full of 100’s of people, you were his absolute and only priority.

I remember being in search of a mentor in my 20’s. I had my dad, but I wanted to know someone outside my own family unit that was making decisions capable of helping me experience the joy of fulfilled life. I was unsuccessful in my search for a long time. Perhaps I was looking in the wrong places. I knew the type of mentor that would benefit me, my future wife and perhaps, one day, my own children. I wanted someone with a very special set of balanced qualities. 

Here are some of the unique characteristics I prayed for in that mentor:  Simple yet adventurous. Methodical, consistent, and yet, fun and exciting. Patient and passionate about, and with, every human soul. Calm in any situation. A priority in faith and family with a passion to be successful financially and in business and profession. A humble listener willing to give grace-filled and direct feedback (even if it stung a bit) through the vantage point of their vast experience, but not so far removed from my own situations.

He genuinely shared every single trait. 

My sadness, now that he’s no longer available to have those conversations, is reflected in that familiar song’s lyrics, “Ya don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it's gone.” Will we revert back in search of the celebrity, the owner of the larger house and more social media followers for our direction and focus? Or will we continue to seek out those in our path that strive to see beauty in the simplest in all of creation?

I write this with joy for the time spent, the blessing in every interaction, and the wisdom he imparted on my own being. But also with deep sadness, even a bit of remorse. Not in his passing, as I am quite confident he is enjoying in heaven the fruits of his simple life, but because his simple and powerful kind are an endangered species. 

Much of our lives seem to have become more of a 100 meter dash filled with 1000's of shallow transactions. These less human and speedy interactions are aimed to achieve “the next level,” additional comfort and a higher financial status. A life that is safer, easier, and constantly envied by others. His life was not patterned after our "standard" methods, but somehow, he achieved even more.

 
I hope my friend’s example lives forever. So much that I’m striving to honor that simple beauty in everything a bit more.

My bicycle is my Lambo. My shorts and t-shirt are my Armani. My early morning runs down a dark, quiet farm road is my Venice Beach. And my chess game with a 12 year old on our living room floor is my Vegas. 

Our work with Lone Oak is less about entertainment and more about fulfillment. It encourages a quiet RV site with family, a simple walk through the woods, a peaceful visit to the animal farm, a conversation in a quiet space, or time spent on the bank of a pond or sitting on a wooden bench under a patio. 

Our mission encourages time away from the distraction of technology, advertisements, financial statements, mortgage payments and insurance premiums. A way to experience freedom in closing a few web browsing tabs and silencing phone notifications. A place to establish a meaningful relationship with a loved one…or perhaps just reconnecting with yourself.

I owe this calling to my friend’s example and hope these words encourage you in the same way.

May the peace of "simple greatness" be with you.

- Brian

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