Ultimately, it seems we all want the same thing…to be at peace, fulfilled and happy.

I​, by nature, ​am a mostly happy, positive person. I tend to look at the brighter side of most everything...a glass half-full kind of guy. I intentionally refrain from watching much news and rarely spend time scrolling through social media. In addition, I believe cynicism is a weak man's attempt at humor, skepticism leaves way for limited opportunity, and comparing my life to someone else's can literally steal my own joy. 

From the very beginning of life, I'm​ also convinced no human is conceived with a natural tendency to intentionally hurt another human...at least simply for the sake of just hurting them.​ (Some will argue this point...but I almost never see the point in arguing either...so there ya go.)

I believe most of this attitude comes naturally. However, there have also been a significant number of optimists in my life from the beginning. (I'm sure my dad is convinced that the term, "darkest before the dawn," refers to the best time to anticipate a remarkably good dawn.) In addition, one of the philosophies I've learned and practiced consistently, "The Strength's Perspective," was taught to me throughout graduate school​. In short, if you focus on the positive aspects of anyone or anything, the challenging, less attractive and less helpful aspects of the situation or behavior will eventually dissolve...leaving only the positive, beneficial attributes. I.E. If you fertilize the healthy grass in your yard, eventually thick grass will take over ​unwanted weeds​ and leave you with a lush golf course.

Recently, however, I discovered something about my daily routine that didn't seem to jive with that same positive attitude I've always had. I hadn't turned into a scrooge (side note, ask Jennifer if I'd turned into a scrooge). I believe I had remained reasonably pleasant, peaceful and joyful, but the conversations with myself had taken a more critical perspective.

It was specifically my morning routine that concerned me. I found that just after waking up and ​even before opening my eyes​, ​I ​would immediately beg​in thinking about all the things I needed to do, change, fix or improve over the course of the upcoming day. I would immediately begin to wonder how I was going to accomplish all of them and what additional problems would be created through all of those challenges. 

​I was "out of the gates" each day focusing on the problems in my life. In turn, it would eliminate the focus on all the great things I had going for me. I believe this process had the potential to manifest even more problems and challenges, until my entire day would feel like I was barreling down "life's freeway" fixing one flat tire after another.

​Maybe some leaders feel the same way, daily. At one time, Elon Musk responded this way to someone sharing their interest in doing his job, "All I do, all day long, is solve problems. Do you really want that?" It may be true. And I know challenge can, at times, create progress. We know that no muscle is ever strengthened without an initial burning sensation. However, I'm also not interested in feeling like Daniel-Son, The Karate Kid, every time he left his apartment (before the "big match"), and Johnny was waiting with his pack of goons around every corner to beat him to a pulp.

I'm interested in much more than survival. I prefer to thrive.

A few weeks ago, and after reading about ​one small portion of someone else's morning routine, I ​decided to make a change. I realized the habit ​ I had ​unintentionally formed ​behind my own, closed, eyelids and in the dark, early morning hours of my own bedroom was nothing less than sabotage. And it had the ability to eliminate opportunity, joy and fulfillment in my, and other's, upcoming day.

​Now, before I open my eyes, I force myself to change direction. At 4:20am it's challenging to physically move and easier to think. So, I begin reciting in my head all the things I have in my favor. These are TRUE FACTS about what I'm about to experience in the next 6 to 12 hours. It may sound a little corny, but it goes something like this, "This is gonna be great. I'm in good health. Jennifer and the kids are healthy. We're spending good time together. The kids are thriving at school. Engaged teachers and coaches. Lone Oak is on a fun path forward. Our team is leading and learning. Friends are supportive. I am grateful. Let's go!"  And as I've done for decades, I immediately go outside, exercise and feed the animals. 

​Before I even open my eyes, I expect to have a good day. It works. Others have accused me of being "lucky." Maybe. But I believe "luck" happens when fate, readiness & desire collide?  I simply always want to be ready with my best...and it starts at 4:20.

This process also enables me to immediately identify people and things that are not interested in my success. Those that don't choose to celebrate when someone else wins simply don't have a place in my day. With an attitude on "strengths," I can make these decisions quickly and move certain people and things to the side. Leaving me to experience the success that was intended within that day. 

​I know it sounds a lot like a Saturday night live episode where a goofy looking fellow with a glazed look and a hairpiece stares in a mirror while repeating, "I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And doggone it, people like me." However, with all the challenges people encounter in life, and there are many, I refuse to harness my day to problems, especially when I know there are many beneficial aspects of my life that I'd prefer to grow. 

What gets focused on, gets improved upon. I'm interested in expanding all the solutions I have within me. I'm addicted to all the positive energy created and every opportunity it will provide me and those around me.

Every game is won by moving the ball down the field and putting points on the scoreboard. A defensive stance to consistently prevent someone else from scoring will, at best, leave you with a 0-0 tie.  Who wants to tie? And who wants to spend their entire life preventing the other guy from scoring? A win, and preferably by a large margin, always provides me more peace, happiness, fulfillment and joy.

​I'm an offensive player. Forward progress is fun. Done the right way, it creates opportunity for everyone. 

The other day, and after explaining to someone about the increased speeds and expanded coverage of our new internet package at Lone Oak for RV'rs, hotel guests and retreat groups, a friend joked with me, "Manhart, more technology? That's not Lone Oak or what you stand for!"  I smiled and responded, "Relax, all we have to do is pull the plug on your router and leave the opportunity for everyone else should they want it." He smiled.

Remain Encouraged,

Brian

www.LoneOakRetreat.com

(you can learn more about Brian by CLICKING HERE)

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